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Posted by Matt on March 31, 2009

Amidst the John Calipari-to-Kentucky turmoil yesterday afternoon this very site surpassed the 1,000,000 hit mark going back to June of 2007  I never thought we’d see numbers like that regardless of how long it took so I appreciate the many (or few) that made this happen and those of you that take the time to comment and engage in fun, interesting, and informative sports banter — that’s what Charlie Hustle and I had in mind back in early 2007, just after the New Year, when the idea for TNB was born.

Thanks goes to all the guys here that post when they can, regardless of how frequently or infrequently;  I realize we’re all busy and it has been a fun ride doing all this with people I call friends.

I hope any of you still around now that things have slowed down in 2009 have enjoyed what we have had to offer along the way and I hope for many more moments in the future.



Posted in The Nasty Boys | 6 Comments »

Movin’ On Up

Posted by Matt on February 13, 2009

Things are progressing nicely and more quickly than I anticipated…plus I am getting an itchy trigger finger.  New content coming February 15th.


Posted in The Nasty Boys | 1 Comment »


Posted by Matt on February 11, 2009

Obviously TNB has been dormant since the New Year and for that I apologize.  Most of the guys have moved on to bigger and better things: careers, families, graduate school, or — in Bob’s case — drunken binges.  We’ve been gone but the site has not been forgotten.

So here is the deal:  with baseball spring training looming, our 1,000,000th hit imminent, and Charlie Hustle needing additional income to feed his degenerate gambling habits, we’re going to be making some gradual, minor changes in hopes of a relaunch on March 1st.  The majority of the design will stay the same as will a majority of the free, below-average content you’ve come to expect.

The one, big change that I hope alienates nobody is our focus.  Instead of our ambiguous approach to 2008, we’re going to narrow our focus for the Northern Kentucky sports sufferer.  Bitchings about the Cincinnati Bengals and Reds, as well as (hopefully) amusing and interesting commentary on the Kentucky Wildcats.  Every once in a while we’ll throw in some very newsworthy or interesting bits from those respective sports and the teams’ respective divisions/conferences.  There won’t be nearly as much mainstream, general fodder but there may be some national stories from the MLB or NFL from time to time.

Just as a recap, our narrowed focus will include the Cincinnati Bengals/AFC North, the Cincinnati Reds/NL Central, the Kentucky Wildcats/Southeastern Conference, and maybe a touch of related news just to switch it up. As always are archives will remain in tact for anyone wanting to check out the back catalog — I’m not sure why you would put yourself through that — as it will only see some minor, reorganizational changes.

There may be many folks who aren’t interested in the above listings and for that I apologize;  I encourage anyone that stops by to stick around despite the changes. I don’t know if the changes will right the ship but we’re going to give it one helluva shot.

See you in March.


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Happy New Year!

Posted by Matt on January 1, 2009

Hope everyone had a very safe and happy New Year’s Eve.  Enjoy the day off and the college Bowl games and try to keep from falling off your New Year’s Resolution wagon at least through the weekend.

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Posted by Matt on December 25, 2008

OK, OK so Hanukkah actually started on Monday but I figured I could knock out both holidays with one post as we’re trying to be green around here during these tough times.

But all jokes aside, I hope that everyone has a happy holiday or winter season, regardless of what you do (or don’t) celebrate. I respect and appreciate them all as much as I do our loyal readers AND OUR MEN AND WOMEN ABROAD!

A very HAPPY Holidays to all of the boys around here: Hustle, Condo, Doc, Bob, Vega, Baller, L.C., and Z — our posts may be few and far between these days but it sure has been a lot of fun with the aforementioned crew.

I hope everyone’s time spent with their families and close friends is both fun and safe and our Military will most definitely be in my thoughts and prayers throughout this week.

Have a good one, and I promise improvements over the coming New Year.


Posted in The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | Comments Off on MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HANUKKAH!

Happy Turkey Day!

Posted by Matt on November 27, 2008


Thanksgiving Day just isn’t quite the same without John Madden, turduckens, and the Lions losing.

Well, without 2 of 3 I guess…

At any rate, I hope any TNB readers have a fun, safe, and tasty Thanksgiving Day!!!

I always take the time at every opportunity to honor our troops abroad as they give me the freedom to say whatever stupid crap I want without fear of consequence.  Our military is one thing I am perpetually thankful for and even more so today (and a big shout out to the 178th Fighter Wing out of Springfield, Ohio!).

So, again, I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday and I hope those deployed have, at minimum, a moment of peace to enjoy Thanksgiving — they deserve more than what we can repay them with.

Have a great day and enjoy the 3 Fs — family, food, and football — and hopefully your fantasy football teams hold up!

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A Day In The Life…

Posted by Matt on November 20, 2008

Wednesday, November 19, 2008 — Somewhere within Bengals Compound.invincible4

10:15AM – 34 hours until Bengals/Steelers game:

A package arrives for Mr. Mike Brown to 1 Paul Brown Stadium, Cincinnati, Ohio 45202. It’s a Netflix envelope. Millions of desperate fans now realize where money for a premier scouting department goes. The flick? Invincible starring Mark Wahlberg as Philadelphia Eagle “walk-on” Vince Papale.

12:00PM – 32 hours, 15 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Credits are rolling for Invincible

Mike Brown: “Brilliant! Get me Papale’s agent. If a guy with such gusto can walk-on for Coach Vermeil in Philadelphia we need to make a move for him by tomorrow night’s game against the Pittsburgh Steelers at 8:15PM exclusively on the NFL Network!”

Apparently Mr. Brown has resorted to product placement advertisement even within his own Front Office. NFL Network pays him $1,000 for every mention. Proceeds go to his daughter’s extensive wardrobe of man-clothes:

katie_zoom Mike Brown: “If their quarterback is dumb enough to not know that there are ties in the NFL we should have no problem trading David Pollack for Vince Papale straight up. Hell, even I knew there are ties and I don’t know a damn thing about football. I will say, however, that I’ve been managing for ties my entire career because it is like I’ve always said, a tie is better than anything else!”

1:15PM – 31 hours until Bengals/Steelers game:

At his daily press conference Marvin Lewis explains his team’s recent struggles.

Marvin Lewis: “Has anybody seen the movie Major League? Mr. Brown let me borrow it off of his Netflix queue, he’s a big Charlie Sheen fan. God, I love Netflix. Anyways, the movie inspired what I thought would be one of my more brilliant coaching strategies for the start of this season. I have always gotten my best coaching schemes from Hollywood, it is why I have a robust .483 professional winning percentage. This strategy has only failed me once, apparently you can’t get angels in the endzone. I thought it was worth a shot. Anyways, about this year. So after watching Major League I decided to install a cardboard stand-up of Katie Blackburn in the locker-room and I told the guys that every time we won a game I would peel off an article of clothing…just like in Major League. Obviously this hasn’t gone over too well…we’re 1-8-1; it seems most of the team would rather the cardboard Blackburn keep her clothes on. Carson actually vomited. So that one is on me, I take full responsibility.”

4:00PM – 28 hours, 15 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Vince Papale, now 62 years old and ravaged by dementia, reports to Bengals Compound confused and slightly intoxicated. Mike Brown has never been more excited by a league-minimum signing.

In the meantime, Fifth-Third Bank has frozen Mr. Brown’s account and put a hold on Papale’s paycheck. Even the seemingly-yet-not-admittedly gay bank teller thinks that the acquisition must be some kind of joke and that someone must have stolen a book of checks from Bengals Compound and forged Mr. Brown’s signature. Many Bengals fans are left to wonder why a similar observation hasn’t occurred sooner.

6:30PM – 25 hours, 45 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Team dinner is promptly served by recently signed lineman/linecook Digger Bujnoch and his family’s catering business, Booj’s. Mike Brown is as giddy as as school girl over the ability to get two services out of Bujnoch for the price of one and begins wondering if Chris Henry would be interested in selling Dippin’ Dots in the stands during defensive drives.

Patting himself on the back for another cost-cutting maneuver done well and unable to dine thanks to a potent case of irritable bowel syndrome, Mr. Brown retires to his quarters with a bottle of Metamucil and the latest Clay Aiken CD. The team leaves town for Pittsburgh shortly thereafter.mv5bmjezmdyymju4nf5bml5banbnxkftztywotixnzu5_v1_sx245_sy400_

Thursday, November 20, 2008 — Somewhere within Bengals Compound.

6:30AM – 13 hours, 45 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Feeling refreshed and rested from the night’s sleep, Mr. Brown settles in his office for his morning coffee while Akili Smith massages BENGAY in to his boss’ aching and aging muscles. Reading the regional newspapers each morning with a cup of joe is always a treat for Mikey; it allows him to revisit each and everyday how well-received he is as team owner in the Cincinnati area.

10:00AM – 10 hours, 15 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

A virtual off-day for the Front Office with the team en route to Pittsburgh, Mr. Brown begins the search for more bargain-basement players to pad his lineup and his resume. It takes little time for a scavenger of Brown’s caliber to realize that Philadelphia has more to offer than just a walk-on wide receiver.

Mike Brown: “I want the ‘garbage picking field goal kicking Philadelphia phenomenon’ and I want him now! If the Eagles were dumb enough to give up Papale for pennies on the dollar, Barney Gorman should be virtually free. I’ll see to it that the league’s most accurate active kicker Shayne Graham never boots another field goal for this team the rest of his career! (shouting to son Paul) Tell ’em will give ’em Odell Thurman and a tub of Bujnoch’s cole slaw! (snickering)”

1:45PM – 6 hours, 30 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Katie Blackburn begins to salivate after watching the “Palumalu Island” promo for the 17th consecutive time while relaxing on her bed.

Katie Blackburn: “God a Troy Palumalu is sooo much sexier than a Troy Blackburn with that flowing Samoan hair. I can’t wait for the Steelers to make the playoffs this year. I know who I’m rooting for: The Pittsburgh Steelers. The one time I root for the teams in our division is when they are in the playoffs. Did I mention how dreamy Troy Palumalu is? I picked the wrong Troy.”

Meanwhile, in Pittsburgh, upon receiving a provocative text message from Bengals Executive Vice President Katie Blackburn, Troy Palumalu vomits a little bit in his mouth.

5:15PM – 3 hours until Bengals/Steelers game:

Marvin Lewis address his team before heading out to complete walk-throughs, warm-ups, and pregame ceremonies.

Marvin Lewis: “Ask not what your team can do for you; ask what you can do for your team. I have a dream that tonight this team will rise up and live out the true meaning of being a Cincinnati Bengal. And after the fight has ended, I hope to stand before you as your leader and declare one thing: Mission Accomplished. Gentlemen I want you to remember one thing tonight: a victory is one small step for this season, but one giant leap for seasons to come. So go out there and give it all you’ve got and win just one for the Gipper because blessed are the victors; for they shall inherit the Division. Amen.”

7:00PM – 1 hour, 15 minutes until Bengals/Steelers game:

Mr. Brown declined to travel for a Thursday night game in chilly Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and with pregame coverage commencing, he decides instead to sit down with his latest Netflix arrival. There will be no tuning in to tonight’s contest between his Bengals and the hated Steelers because even Mike Brown is too cheap to pay for the NFL Network.

(Ed.’s Note: Thanks to Charlie Hustle for some inspiration for this complete waste of your time.)

Posted in Cincinnati Bengals, NFL, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: , | 2 Comments »

A Friend Of The Site Is Joining The Site

Posted by Matt on October 28, 2008

Exciting news for me is a long-time friend of mine and a long-time friend of the site will be joining us with his insights. This comes at a perfect time with the college and NFL football seasons in full force, college basketball season just around the corner, and my conscientious effort to return to blogging.  You will know him as ZRO and he’s as much of an avid Kentucky Wildcats as I am so now there’s not one, but two of us.  You’ve been warned.  Other items of interest for my man ZRO are lacrosse, MILFs, late-night walks on white, sandy beaches, and beer — so he’ll fit right in around here.

ZRO has a lot on his mind and I am confident that you will not only enjoy what he has to say but find that his thoughts incite a high-quality level of discussion and debate.  ZRO’s first post will drop in the very near future so look forward to that and get excited about what is to come.  If you can’t get excited about what is going on around here these days you may want to check your pulse (or maybe even consider Viagra).

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Bringing Blogging Back

Posted by Matt on October 22, 2008

It has been nearly seven weeks since I have posted here on TNB and a lot has happened in my hiatus.  The Bengals signed a criminal (again), Pacman Jones was suspended (again), and we landed on the Moon — and no, these aren’t your father’s headlines.

OK, maybe two of three happened but the bottom line is that I’ve been silent for too long.  I have got a lot on my mind and it is high time I got back to the basics.  I’m bringing blogging back.

TNB came to a point where we bit off more than we could chew and blogging became so overwhelming that I went all Ricky Williams and disappeared for two months.  But that has changed and I hope to make my return this Friday with a Halloween-themed post a week before my favorite holiday.

Tell all of your friends.  Put the women and children to bed.   It’s starting all over again.

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I’m Back Like Brett Favre

Posted by Matt on August 19, 2008

Yes, this is an actual screen shot of a game of Tecmo Super Bowl I won against the computer during my time off. I told you I had important business to tend to.

Everyone can breath a sigh of relief as I have returned to give direction and purpose to your life; however, a lot happened while I was off rescuing the illegitimate children of Shawn Kemp — let’s relive some of the memories, shall we?

Brett Favre Unretired: Did you hear about this story? It was lucky to make the back pages…

Several MLB’ers Were Traded: Thank you, Cincinnati, for trading away the only reasons I had to watch a Reds game the rest of the season.

-The Chinese Government Faked A Bunch Of Olympic Crap: In communist China the national anthem sings you!

Michael Phelps Won An Ass Load Of Gold Medals: Suck it, Spitz.

U.S. Gymnast Shawn Johnson Stole Our Hearts: She’ll be 18 on January 19, 2010 for those of you who are interested [See: Bob Swerski].

-And Doug Gottlieb Probably Stole Your Wallet: Once a thief, always a thief.

-The Bengals Resigned Chris Henry: …wait, what?

As you can see we have a lot to catch up on and that was only the tip of it, just to see how it felt. By the looks of things around here while I was gone it is time to start cracking that whip…

It has been too long,


Posted in General Sports, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | 4 Comments »

General Updates

Posted by Matt on July 25, 2008

It is worth noting two things:

1) I will be relatively unseen for a while and Condo will likely be running things in the background for me (I am OK, just busy with school related ventures).

2) Although I am somewhat absent from here, I am not back home in Dayton, Ohio thus I did NOT cause the brawl that ensued between the Dayton Dragons (Low-A Reds) and the Peoria Chiefs (Low-A Cubs) last night.  I must say, however, that a drunken and belligerent Matt/Bob Swerski combination would almost make perfect sense as being the spark that set 5/3 Field ablaze considering we’re Reds/Cubs fans, respectively.  We’re convenient suspects but I can say that I am fairly certain it was NOT me and Bob, although my recollection of last night is EXTREMELY fuzzy.

If I get free time, I may post some.  If not, sorry about your luck — you’ll have to find other ways to validate your existence.

Posted in The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | 1 Comment »

Baller’s Official SEC Preview: LSU Edition

Posted by Baller on July 24, 2008

2007 Record- 12-2 (6-2)

Returning Starters- 13 (7-Offense, 5-Defense, K)

Players to Watch out for: Charles Scott, Keiland Williams, and Demetrius Byrd

Key Losses: Matt Flynn, Jacob Hester, Early Doucet, Glenn Dorsey, Craig Steltz

2008 Strengths: OL and DL should hold this team together and should allow them to win 9-10 wins easily.

2008 Weaknesses: No QB experience, huge losses on offense and defense. LSU should be able to fill these gaps but will lose a couple of games due to this lack of leadership and experience.

2008 Overview: LSU has the athletes to compete for the SEC once again, but with all the losses they sustained it will be difficult. At UF, at Auburn, and at USC does not help these losses. LSU should win at least 8 or 9 though. Also they play App St. Lets hope they dont look past the national champs.

Posted in NCAA Football, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | 1 Comment »

100 People and Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (10-1)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on July 14, 2008

10-“The SEC Continues Its Dominace” (A National Championship and the first sophomore to win the Heisman in history should make for a great lead-in for the 2008 SEC football season.)

9-“The Greatest Upset” (Normally Applachian State and Michigan isn’t on the top of everyone’s must-see games in college football, but the first televised football game of the Big Ten Network proved to be one for the ages.)

8-“Banner 17” (After 22 years in the wilderness, the Boston Celtics returned to glory by beating the Jesus out of the Lakers. In the process, it gave Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett, and Ray Allen their first NBA title and Shaq more fodder for his freestyles.)

7-“Come After Me, I’m A Man” (While for the most part I didn’t understand originally what was the fuss over an article in what is known as America’s worst newspaper, I began to realize what the problem was after I sobered up from a night of drinking the next morning.)


6-“Kentucky: It’s More Than Basketball” (In one of the most memorable football games in the history of Kentucky football, the underdog Wildcats defeated the #1 LSU Tigers, therefore exercising the ghost Devery Henderson making a miraculous catch five years before. My best moment from the aftermath was calling Matt to congratulate the University of Kentucky on their historic win.)

5-“Spygate” (No matter how you slice it, the Patriots exposed as cheaters gave Colts fans like myself enough reason to hate the Patriots. Even though they went undefeated in the regular season, they still choked when it mattered.)

4-“Bonds Does It” (Love him or hate him, Barry Bonds became the all-time leading home run king in the early days of the blog. Believe it or not, I’m probably one of the few people that don’t believe he took the juice.)

3-Tim Donaghy (The shame of all NBA referees.)

2-Michael Vick (One of the many cautious stories I tell a few of my friends who want to go into pro sports is the tale of Michael Vick and his “friends”. I wonder how many of them are going to have his back when he gets out.)

1-“Forever Blue and Gray” (38 wins, a third straight C-USA championship, #1 longer than any team in school history, and a cast of characters that will forever be a part of Memphis sports history, is a good reason why this event as well many of the people and events shaped our first year. Enough said.)

My time’s up. I would like to thank each and every one of you for making our blog the success that it’s been for the past year. The best is definitely yet to come.

Thanks again and God Bless,

Doc Holliday, Jr.

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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (20-11)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on July 4, 2008

20-“Josh Hamilton’s Comeback Story” (Whether you’re a baseball fan or not, you can’t help but love the comeback story that has been former Red and current Ranger Josh Hamilton, who is among AL leaders in RBI, home runs, and batting average.)

19-“The Year of Derrick Rose” (Probably one of the most heralded, wait, the most heralded recruit to ever come to Memphis since Keith Lee way back in 1982.)

18-“The Rockies’ Magical Run” (11 straight wins and a one-game playoff added to Colorado’s first National League pennant in franchise history.)

17-Jennifer Rivers (A long time ago I wrote a column for another website on how most guys never run into girls that root for the same team that they do or even worse, know nothing about sports. Thankfully, Ms. Rivers isn’t one of them girls.)

16-“The Kevin Garnett Trade” (At first I was being realistic about this trade when it happened, but as soon as the Celtics came out the gates and then, we all know what happened in the NBA Finals.)

15-“The Game Of The Century” (As I said before, Dr. Bradley Greer was and is one of the few Vol fans I can actually stand. Apparently after the Tennessee-Memphis game on Feb. 23rd, I had a mind to tear him a new one after they beat us.)

14-“Flushed Down The Drain” (The 1964 Phillies, the 1969 Cubs, the 1995 Angels, the 2003 Cubs, and the 2004 Yankees had nothing on this collapse in New York as the Mets folded up shop in the final weeks of the season and blew a seven-game lead that gave the Phillies its first division title since 1993.)

13-The Walker Family (Normally in most cases, the family that prays together stays together. In this case, the family that reads TNB together stays together.)

12-BD and Ginny (The picture explains everything, except the fact that both of them can strike me out with three pitches in softball and I blame one for my heavy Coke drinking.)

11-“Davidson’s Run” (If this was a movie, Stephon Curry would hit a three-pointer with 10 seconds left and we wouldn’t have to hear about Kansas and Mario (Bleeping) Chalmers.)

My time’s up. RIP George Carlin.

Doc Holliday, Jr.

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Posted by Matt on July 4, 2008


On behalf of the crew, I’d like to wish everyone a fun, safe, and potentially intoxicated holiday weekend.  Thanks to all of the loyal readers and thanks to the boys here for sticking with me.  I’ll be out of the “office” all day today and most likely the rest of the weekend as well.  Be sure to enjoy the beer, brats, explosives, and…more beer!

Not to sound like a broken record but a Happy 4th Of July goes out to our troops, past and current; at home and abroad.  Above all other days (Memorial, Veterans, etcetera) I feel that the 4th Of July is the MOST important when honoring our military because without the troops, today would have little meaning.  If you have a moment before the start of your drunken stupor (I am talkin’ to you, Swerski) be sure to remember the men and women in uniform.  Hopefully those currently at war will have a free, safe moment in their day to realize what they mean to this holiday.

Thanks again to all and be safe, have fun, and — as always — drink one a few for me.


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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (30-21)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 26, 2008

30-“Notre Dame’s Lost Season” (After contending for a National Championship for most of 2006 behind the arm of Brady Quinn, the Fighting Irish fell way back to earth as they finished 3-9 and lost to the Naval Academy for the first time in 44 years.)

29-“Shock The World, Kid” (While Crichton’s basketball season ended prematurely in Nashville on March 6th against Trevecca, the softball ladies from North Highland Park made a run to the third day of the tournament in only their second year of varsity competition, where they would lose to Union University 10-1.)

28-“Tigers Bounce Back” (After doing my share of ripping the Memphis Tigers football team, they suddenly righted the ship and bounced back to a 6-2 mark in C-USA play and a 7-6 record overall as well as a berth to the New Orleans Bowl.)

27-Gamecock Sports Forum (One thing we love to do here at TNB is make friends. And apparently with Steven and the gang at GSF, as they’ve been our best friends on the Internet. And I say that in a non-homosexual way.)

26-“Some Big Sisters Have It Better Than Others” (On March 9th, my big sister Renetria turned 25 and on that same day, Drake University won the Missouri Valley Conference and the right to be in the Big Dance for the first time in 38 years.)

25-C. Trent Rosencrans (The former Cincinnati Post beat writer for the Reds, he had a profound impact on the style of writing we present to the masses each day by entertaining Reds and even Cardinal fans like myself.)

24-“The Basketball Sisterhood” (In Feburary, I wrote a column on Crichton’s biggest female basketball fans that got a lot of great feedback around campus. Too bad this was the only picture in which all of the members was in.)

23-Michael “The Great One” Sapp (Another ardent supporter of the website from North Highland Park, he is also one of the few Laker fans I can actually tolerate.)

22-“Whuh’s My Tickets?” (Bruce Pearl complained on the eve of the Tennessee-Memphis game that he couldn’t get any tickets. Obviously trying to get your freak on with Erin Andrews was the only thing that you could get out of playing the Tigers.)

21-“The Scott Rolen Era Ends In St. Louis” (After six seasons, Scott Rolen finally gets his wish and leaves town for Toronto where as I write this, is in last place in the AL East and is looking to hire Q or Sarah as their new manager for 2009.)

My time’s up. RIP George Carlin.

Doc Holliday, Jr.

Posted in General Sports, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | Comments Off on 100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (30-21)

A Call To Arms

Posted by Matt on June 24, 2008

Our good friend Matt — or Indiana Matt — over at Licensed To Blog recently tagged The Nasty Boys in a viral post that each author is permitted to put his or her own spin on. Because we support the endeavors of those who support us we would not think twice about participating.

The Rules:

  • Write your own six word memoir.
  • Post it to your blog including a visual illustration if you would like.
  • Link to the person who tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere.
  • Tag 5 more blogs with links.
  • Don’t forget to leave a comment in the tagged blogs with an invitation to play.

I felt inclined to go ahead and take on this task in honor of The Nasty Boys Sports Blog, being this site’s charter member, and I pray that I do not disappoint. It took me eight words to say what most are saying in six and I know many will reference the rules and say that I have failed in this task; however, when I read “six word” I interpreted “eight word” so deal with it.

Without further ado, my six eight word memoir (with photo illustration):

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of another beer.

And there you have it, in all of six eight words I did my part in this interesting internet experiment, albeit bending the rules along the way. Below are the five blogs that fulfill my obligation to finishing the job, but even if your blog has not been tagged here — or anywhere — feel free to copy and paste the rules from here (because let’s face it, that’s exactly what I did) and participate along with us.

The Blogs (Friends) I’ve Tagged:

Posted in General Sports, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | 5 Comments »

100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (40-31)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 23, 2008

40-Jasmine Scudder

39-“The Georgia Gang” (While NASCAR had the Alabama Gang, Crichton’s basketball program had the Georgia Gang that consisted of Michael Sapp, Stanley Brownlee, Slim Wimbush, and Sly Watkins, Jr., all of whom had ties to the Peach State.)

38-“CDR’s Finest Moment” (In the national semifinals, Chris Douglas-Roberts made a statement by dunking on UCLA’s Kevin Love. In the process, Love seeks out the guidance of Dr. Chris Scott for self-esteem issues.)

Brittney Davis, Bradley Greer, Ginny Galloway May 7, 2008

37Bradley Greer (The only Vol fan I can tolerate.)

36-“Florida State Football: Portrait of Dishonesty” (You know its bad when half of your team gets busted for cheating on a final before a bowl game against Kentucky.)

35-“Mama Lisa” (In the early days of my coverage of sports here in North Highland Park, one of my first supporters and second moms around North Highland Park was “Mama Lisa”. Obviously I spent more time getting advice from her on girls to life after college than I did in class.)

34-Matt “The Colonel” Sanders (Another early supporter of the blog in North Highland Park who later pleaded with me to be on my best behavior when I started doing announcing for softball games and said that I should do a reality show concerning my book.)

33-“Did You Guys Show Up?” (Days after Fisk’s women lost bad in a basketball game against Lipscomb, the Fisk men did one better by getting blown out by Crichton in Nashville. When Fisk played in Memphis in January, the team got confused and lost on their way to the gym.)

32-“Whatever Happened To Mental Intensity?” (Towards the end of the basketball season, I decided to face shortstop Aimee Grissom in a game of basketball. Apparently I didn’t have a clue on how to stop her shot.)

31-“What A Way To Fall To Earth” (After making the NCAA Regionals in 2008, the Memphis Tigers baseball team went back to their own losing ways. Don’t worry, I may try and see if I can make a power move over on campus about their baseball program.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience.

Doc Holliday, Jr.

Posted in General Sports, The Nasty Boys | Tagged: | 5 Comments »

100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (50-41)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 18, 2008

50-“The Miracle on Vance” (Days after a big win against Martin Methodist, Crichton’s Derek Boykin hits a game-winner with less than 2 seconds to go in a home game against Lyon College to continue their longest winning streak of the year.)

49-“Kansas Is A Football School?” (For the first time in my basic lifetime the Jayhawks were playing meaningful games in November. Apparently six months later, I began to resent anything and anyone from the state of Kansas.)

48-“Orange Crushed” (For the first time in the 99-year history of Tennessee basketball, the Volunteers earned a #1 ranking. However, it would be short-lived as Vanderbilt welcomed the Vols to Memorial Gym and quickly humbled them.)

47-“Praying For Doc Hancock” (In 1952, people in Brooklyn prayed for Gil Hodges to break out of his slump in the 1952 World Series. In 2008, people in North Highland Park prayed for me to get a very cute softball player’s number before school let out.)

46-“Crank That Georgia Bulldogs” (In the first quarter of their annual game against Florida, the Georgia Bulldogs decided to celebrate their touchdown by running out on the field and getting a lion’s share of excessive celebration penalties.)

45“Q, The Blue Eyed Princess”

44-“25th Avenue South Blues” (In one of the most lopsided wins for Vanderbilt basketball when, on Feb 12th, Kentucky walked into Memorial Gym and received a woodshed beating at the hands of the Commodores, its worst SEC loss in their long and storied history.)

43-“The Midnight Massacre 2008 Edition” (After beating the Angels on Monday night, the New York Mets decides to fire manager Willie Randolph in the middle of the night. And Wednesday morning I woke up finding out that my cell phone services was suspended until I pay $80.53.)

42-“Jackson, Tennessee Times Two” (Not long after moving to my apartment, the “Basketball Brotherhood decided that they liked the city of Jackson, Tennessee so much that they wanted to play there twice in one week. Too bad they left the city with losses to both Lambuth and Union.)

41-“Digging Big Papi” (On the construction site of the new Yankee Stadium, a Red Sox fan decides to place a curse on the Yankees by digging a David Ortiz jersey in the ground. Sadly, the Yankees figured that one curse was enough to endure.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience. Donate money to the “Help Me Get My Phone Back On” fund so I can get it back on before the Fourth.

Doc Holliday Jr.

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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (60-51)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 17, 2008

60-“Go And Get Your Money, Bobby P.” (What do you do after inheriting a mess in Atlanta? You run like Bobby Petrino and take a job with the Arkansas Razorbacks as their new head football coach and get called everything but a child of God by your former players in Atlanta.)

59-“Our Mess Is Your Mess And Your Mess Alone” (Recently, New York Mets manager Willie Randolph accused SNY, which broadcasts Met games of being racist in their coverage of him. Well, blowing a seven-game lead wasn’t racist, was it?”)

58-Kenisha Banks (One of North Highland Park’s biggest basketball fans and best female pool players, she along with her cousin, who was number 66 on the list, made my job of writing sports columns in North Highland Park a whole lot easier throughout the school year.)

57-“I’m A Damn Good Coach” (Hours before LSU was to play Tennessee, Les Miles emphasized that he was a damn good coach and was staying put at LSU despite rumors of him jumping ship for Michigan to replace Lloyd Carr. Which he actually did.)

56-“RIP Cincinnati Post” (On the final day of 2007, we reached 100,000 hits while in Cincinnati, a 126-year tradition ended as the Cincinnati Post published its final edition.)

55-“Snowballs In St. Louis” (When the “Basketball Brotherhood” made a stop in St. Louis, the city and the entire area was covered knee deep in snow. Obviously, after shootaround on the campus of Harris-Stowe State University, it was enough snow for us to have a snowfight.)

54-Josh Helton (Todd Helton’s little brother, who was at Trevecca last year breaking hearts here in North Highland Park as one of the best players in the TransSouth Conference. Too bad he had a nutjob for a dad.)

53-“The Cruelest Thing You Could Do” (After being released by the Padres, Jim Edmonds decides to pay a debt back to Satan and my friend Amanda by playing for the Cubs.)

52-Kyle “The Golden Child” O’Neil

51-“Scooop” (While “Scoop” may be one of the best nicknames ever for an athlete, former Crichton softball player Ashley Smith carried that nickname well here in North Highland Park, all the way to a degree and probably enough knowledge of Vol football to become athletic director in Knoxville.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience.

Doc Holliday, Jr.

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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (70-61)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 12, 2008

As you know, June marks our first anniversary as “The Nasty Boys”, so in honor of that, I’ll be presenting my list of 100 people and events that made our first year enjoyable as your morning laugh after a bad hangover:

70-John Tibbits (On this site, Matt talks a lot about how much he supports the troops and with regard to that, I had to mention my predecessor as student basketball assistant, John Tibbits, who is now serving in the National Guard as I write this and is the only Patriots fan I can tolerate.)

69-“5 Gummi Bears A Day Keeps The Doctor Away” (During the Tigers’ run in the NCAA Tournament, freshman phenom Derrick Rose had a bad stomach ache due to excessive consumption of candy. If only he had saved it for the offseason.)

68-“Another Improbable Bunch Of Cardinals” (After witnessing my beloved Cardinals win the 2006 World Series, almost a year later, the Louisville Cardinals would make their own magical run to the 2007 College World Series, their first in school history by beating Missouri and Oklahoma State.

67-Will “The General” (Ever wonder who “The General” was? Well, like Matt, he’s a proud graduate of the University of Kentucky who makes his late-night weekend comments on here during the football season.) (Matt’s Note: I think The General also makes every attempt to give me hell on a weekly basis.)

66-Brittanee McCaster (On the final day before Fall Break, my friend Brittanee (pictured on the left) shocked the entire campus in North Highland Park by beating me in pool. Not long after that, I decided to start an award for the upset of the week in college football and name it honor of her.)

65-“Don’t Touch My President” (In a year that saw a lot of mayhem on and off the bench in North Highland Park, the last one was out of left field as at the end of the final regular season home game when Freed-Hardeman coach Jason Shelton and Coach Walker got into a brouhahaha. The interesting thing is the notable quote from Coach Walker, “Don’t touch my president!!!!”)

64-“Let A Light Shine On You” (During the Tigers’ second round game against Mississippi State, Joey Dorsey is greeted by a shining beacon of light while shooting a free throw.)

63-“Lloyd’s Last Call” (For all intents and purposes, after I ripped Lloyd Carr in September of last year, I couldn’t help myself but to be proud of the way he went out against the Gators in the Capitol One Bowl.)

62-“Reality Check” (Days after the devastation caused by the tornadoes in Jackson, Tennessee, Crichton’s basketball team made a trip through the city to see the devastation firsthand en route to a game with Mid-Continent.)

61-Zarko Brankovic (That picture explains everything.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience.

Senator Ryne E. “Doc” Hancock

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Posted by Matt on June 8, 2008

In honor of our one year anniversary/birthday, and because we have nothing better to do, we’re adding a new staff member in the form of Baller.   B will be working mostly on college football for us with a focus on the SEC and the ACC and we’ll be doing more cross-promotional stuff with Steven and his brain child ACC vs. SEC.

We’re REALLY excited to have Baller around and we know you’re excited too.  Please treat Baller with all the respect you would if you caught him in bed with your wife.

Don’t overlook Bob’s newest below and I promise Doc will be around to finish his Top 25 NCAA basketball programs list in the near future — plus Baller’s first is on the horizon.  Exciting stuff.

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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (80-71)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 6, 2008

80-“Dyersburg’s Gift To North Highland Park’s Freak Accident” (Not too long after the freak accident that occurred when yours truly was hit by a pitch in between a softball doubleheader, Dyersburg native and soccer player Bradley Greer would have an accident that to this very day is still a mystery here in North Highland Park.)

79-“We Got That Wood” (Houston Nutt and running back Darren McFadden leads the Razorbacks to an upset win over top-ranked LSU. In the postgame interview, Darren McFadden holds up a two-by-four and proclaims, “We got that wood!!!”)

78-“The Year of Shan Foster” (Lost in the shuffle of Derrick Rose and Chris Lofton, Vanderbilt’s Shan Foster had a season to remember in Nashville. Averaging a shade over 20 points a game, Foster helped the Commodores to the most wins by a Vanderbilt squad in 107 years of basketball. Too bad it went for naught as they were upended by Siena in the first round.)

77-“Hey, You’re That Guy From The Saw Movies” (For all intents and purposes, Union basketball coach Ralph Turner was not the guy that said, “Cherish your life.”)

76-“The Pau Gasol Trade” (A year removed from almost bolting for Chicago, Grizzles forward Pau Gasol traded BBQ for Jack Nicholson. Now the Grizzles are smarting themselves from another lottery screwjob and Gasol is in the Finals.)

75-“Stan The Man, Meet Stan Brownlee” (In 1948, St. Louis Cardinals great Stan Musial won the National League’s MVP award. 60 years later, Stan Brownlee would become Crichton’s all-time leading scorer on March 1st against Freed-Hardeman)

74-“White Suits After Labor Day” (To participate in Louisville’s “White-Out”, Rick Pitino decides to join in the fun by wearing a white suit. But after a shitty start, he decides to break out the navy suit in the second half against UCONN which later on paid off.)

73“Dream Game It Wasn’t” (Given the fact that Lil’ Wayne wasn’t performing at the the Super Bowl, softball player and fellow senator Jasmine Scudder decided to have us play basketball in the gym here in North Highland Park. Of course, the shame of that evening was the upstaging of our team by two hot chicks, one of which humiliated a certain sportswriter not too long after.)

72-“East Meets West” (Eastern Kentucky and Western Kentucky decides after a long time of not playing each other in football to renew their rivalry. Right now a bunch of hicks are celebrating this over a quart of bourbon.)

71-“We Serve To Not Win” (Crichton’s first season of volleyball was deemed to be a bit of struggle, but because of the addition of former Tiger volleyball player Kelsey Watson and Jayne Moonmen, the fortunes of volleyball here in North Highland Park will most likely change for the better.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience.


Senator Doc Hancock

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Thanks For A Great First Year!

Posted by Matt on June 5, 2008

Today marks the OFFICIAL 1 year birthday/anniversary of The Nasty Boys Sports Blog, and even though we had a prior home to this (The Sports Guys) we had a rebirth here under our new name on June 5, 2007.

In honor of our first year I would like to recognize — in no particular order — other blogs and sites and their owners that have helped us get to this point and have helped create great conversation here and have created even better content and conversation on their own sites:

I sincerely apologize if I left anyone out but I’m sure you know that I thank you as well. I have also symbolically deleted our previous establishment (also because I forgot to do it 6 months ago).

A special thanks goes out to Charlie Hustle, Condo, Doc Hancock, Bob Swerski, and Vega — without the crew, there wouldn’t have been a blog for me to kill time with at work and it was nice to be able to create this site with a group of friends.

But most importantly, a HUGE THANK YOU goes to anyone who still takes the time to read this crap. Sometimes we don’t write the long, thought-provoking columns that we have in the past or sometimes we even go a stretch without writing at all, but some of you still stop by and I think I speak on behalf of everyone here when I say that means a lot.

So a big thank you to everyone mentioned and involved and I promise that though sometimes there are down-times between posts we haven’t given up. All six of us are very busy with our professional and personal lives but we’re all still around and have NOT thrown in the towel. We hope to have as fun and successful second year as we had in the first and we hope you will all stick around for the ride.

Lastly, this wouldn’t be me without thanking a group of men and women that a few of my best friends are a part of: The Troops. Thanks to everyone in the military who fights to give me the right to write whatever bullshit I want on this very site and actually have it read. I feel we cannot thank them enough.

Thanks again,


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100 People And Events That Shaped The First Year Of TNB (90-81)

Posted by Ryne E. Hancock on June 2, 2008

As you know, June marks our first full year of operation as “The Nasty Boys’ Sports Blog”, so in honor of the occasion I will give you guys my list of the 100 people and events that shaped our first year of operation. Here’s 81-90:

90-“Coach O, You Just Got Croomed” (When Coach O took over the Ole Miss football program, I like so many SEC fans around Memphis was excited. But when he led the Rebels to probably some of its worst moments in over seven decades in football, including the season finale against Mississippi State Thanksgiving weekend when Coach O’s coaching genius giftwrapped the game for Mississippi State and led to his firing the very next day.)

89-“The Wild Pitch Heard Around North Highland Park” (In the early days of the 2008 softball season, pitcher Sierra Coltharp by accident threw a pitch that nailed yours truly square in the leg while going to collect lineups for the second game of a doubleheader between Crichton and Williams Baptist. As of this writing, the bruise is gone, but the hilarity isn’t.)

88-“Blue Mountain’s Baptism By Fire” (Little Blue Mountain College, located less than an hour from Memphis, played its first year of varsity men’s basketball and much like the bad Fairview Junior High School teams of the mid-to-late 90’s that I covered as sports editor, they managed to win none of their games and finish the season 0-29.)

87-Amanda The Playboy Bunny (Being a Cubs fan in Southern Illinois takes a lot of courage. Even if you’re hotter than a firecracker.)

86-“Fight Night In Bumpkinham” (As a Tigers fan, I never had too much contempt for UAB, although the night of Feb. 16th, while en route back to Memphis from a trip with the basketball team, the Tigers, who eked out a hard fought win against UAB, the fans in Bumpkinham gave me a reason to show contempt for them when after a controversial ending, the student section there threw all kinds of crap at the Tigers, including a bottle of Thunderbird whiskey, which shows that like Crichton graduate Brandon Privett said, it’s not called an alcoholic until you complete your graduation requirements.)

85-“No Water, No Problem” (During a trip to Waleska, Georgia, the hotel Crichton was staying in had no hot water, so instead of fighting City Hall, Crichton decided to take their lack of hot water out on the court by beating Reinhardt College the following Saturday by 23)

84-“Grace Will Lead You To The Cotton Bowl” (During my Thanksgiving trip to southeast Missouri, I wrote on my friend Grace’s Facebook page asking for grace in Mizzou’s game with Kansas. Ironically, grace did not lead the Missouri Tigers to the National Championship game.)

83-“Miss Candy” (Long before Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo, I spent much of the summer of 2006 being distracted by a girl that I called “Miss Candy”, which is second from left. Strangely, I decided to turn those adventures into some silly book that is out this summer.)

Crichton’s TNB Staff, October 25, 2007

82- “Bob Knight Gets Upstaged In North Highland Park” (As funny as it sounds, I share my birthday with Robert Montgomery Knight, which is a huge task because apparently, our personalities are totally different. On my 23rd birthday, the TNB staff in North Highland Park decided to throw a surprise birthday bash for their boss. Wonder if Knight got the same treatment from Neil Reed.)

81- “Blogging Is A Crime?” (The topic of my first column for TNB surrounded the controversy that surrounded Louisville Courier-Journal’s Brian Bennett liveblogging of the deciding game of the Super Regionals between Louisville and Oklahoma State. Apparently, they decided he would better off by blogging in the middle of the Ohio RIver.)

My time’s up. You’ve been a great audience.


Senator Doc Hancock

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