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Da Bears Bite Da Dust

Posted by Bob Swerski on January 1, 2009

I find it difficult to listen to AM670 The Score after a Bears game.  I don’t know why I tune my radio in, but I do and it drives me friggin crazy.  Sunday was no exception.

I’m sitting at a buddy’s house watching the Bears jump out to a quick  10-0 lead against the already eliminated Texans.  We have the computer tuned into the Viqueens and Oakland games to find out that the Giants played their starters and are involved in a close game against the ‘Queens and Oakland jumped out to an early lead against Tampa Bay.  All seems to be going as planned in Chicago.

Then the disaster which is the Bears strikes deep into the hearts of Chicago fans.  A swiss cheese defensive secondary, an inadequate defensive line, a fumbled kickoff return, and a quarterback who can’t throw the ball accurately downfield to a receiving corp among the worst in professional football.  This all leads to the mediocre Texans crushing the Bears in a game which looks close in the score column, but wasn’t at all close.

Where can I begin?

First of all, there is no difference between Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton.  They both suck, plain and simple.  Orton turns the ball over less, so his pathetic quarterback play often gets overlooked.  He isn’t “improving week by week” as some analysits like to claim.  He has reached his pinnacle and it is pathetic.

Next, it doesn’t much matter who we have throwing the ball because our receivers all suck.  Hester is not a number one type of receiver.  He is more like a Santonio Holmes type of speed receiver who can get downfield, run a few reverses, and make a big play happen.  The Bears need a guy like Hines Ward (sticking with the Pittsburgh analogy) to pick up first downs.

Now on to the defense.  The defense is the most pathetic aspect of the Bears team.  While they aren’t necessarily as bad as the offense, they have much more talent so more is expected.  Their secondary sucks.  Their defensive line gets no pressure.  Their linebackers (Brian Urlacher in particular) are playing nowhere near what they are getting paid.  They lead the league in take-a-ways, but that is because they only go for the strip so they also lead the league in failed tackles and yards given up after initial contact.   The Bears defense makes every quarterback look like a fucking Hall of Famer for Christ’s sake.  The total combined numbers for quarterbacks in the Bears final 6 loses have been:

156/229      1762 total yards      10 touchdowns

…The Bears defense combined for 3 total sacks in these 6 loses.

Finally, the coaching staff is terrible.  The Bears are one of the most unimaginative teams in football.  There is a quote that goes “insanity is doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results.”  This sums up what my thoughts are of the Bears coaching motto.  They do the same boring crap over and over again on offense.  Their defense doesn’t blitz or get any pressure on the quarterback.  Their are never any defensive line stunts.  The offense hardly ever runs outside the hashmarks.  There are never any trick plays.  They never throw the ball to wide receivers, only tight ends and running backs.  The coaching staff has turned the Bears into the most uninspired, boring, most predictable teams in the NFL.

To top it all off, the Eagles ended up winning so all the Bears had to do was win their game.  The two underdog teams (Philly and Oakland) pulled out victories (Oakland didn’t even have anything to play for), and the Bears laid a fucking egg.

Word of the week:  Disappointing


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