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Ian Poulter Has Dug His Own Grave

Posted by Matt on January 30, 2008


The douche pictured above is some British golfer named Ian Poulter. Never heard of him? Good, neither had I.

On the cusp of the Dubai Desert Classic in the gorgeous UAE, Poulter decided to light a fire under the ass of a guy who just throttled the field by nine strokes at the Buick Classic last weekend by saying he was the only one that could challenge Woods on the tour and that Tiger would win the Master’s but when it came to the U.S. Open, “You can put me down for that one.”

Real smart, Ian. Let’s see how that has worked out for people in the past:

2006 WCG-Accenture Matchplay Championships:

Steven Ames was paired with Tiger Woods in the opening round of the matchplay style tournament and was asked by one reporter what he thought about his chances of being the world’s #1:

“Anything can happen,” Ames said with a smile, “especially where he is hitting the ball.” –Steven Ames

Result: Tiger went on to crush Ames 9 and 8 (up nine holes with eight holes to go), which means they stopped playing after 10 holes because it wasn’t possible for Ames to comeback. This is the quickest anyone can be defeated in matchplay style. When asked about Ames’ comments after the match Tiger responded merely, “9 and 8.”

2007 Wachovia Championships:

Rory Sabbatini took a one stroke lead over Tiger in to his Final Round pairing with him but ended up losing to Woods by one. Rory had this to say about him after the round — despite losing — when asked how Tiger ‘looked’ on the course:

“…he looked as beatable as ever.” –Rory Sabbatini

Result – 2007 Bridgestone Invitational At Firestone: Rory Sabbatini again took a one stroke lead over Tiger in to a Final Round pairing with the best on the planet and, thanks to his previous comments, Sabbatini was embarrassed by Woods to the tune of 9 strokes on the day and an 8 stroke defeat for the tournament. Rory has since pulled out of the 2007 Target World Challenge, Tiger’s 16-man tournament to support his foundation, which gave Sabbatini a permanent seat on Woods’ shit list and caused quite a stir this past December.

2008 Dubai Desert Classic:

Nobody knows for sure what will happen but I don’t understand why the young players continue to insert foot in mouth. Poulter has now found himself in a similar situation and one can only hope the Golf Gods will smite Ian in the manner they did Rory — by giving him a lead but pairing him with Tiger on Sunday

Result: I’ll take Tiger by 10.



4 Responses to “Ian Poulter Has Dug His Own Grave”

  1. Scott said

    You know. You wish you were half as good as Ian Poulter is. Oh yea, his flare on the golf course is just what this sport needs.

  2. Ian Poulter is so good he is winning the US Open… oh wait, he got SMOKED and cut

  3. Condo said

    Hey Ian, mark you down for the US Open eh? You were doing SO well that for the good of the other players, you withdrew from the tournament…

    Now THAT’S Sportsmanship right there!

  4. Dan said

    Hey woods worshipers, THIS just in! If you’re going to act like every tournament is between Tiger and Ian. Ian just kicked Woods ass in the ’09 US Open! Man, looks like Tiger’s gonna have to take himself a little less seriously now that people are paying attention to someone else in golf besides him and Phil. Damn, this guy is better spoken AND dressed. Mark me down Poulter!

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