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The Sports Shorts – 2nd Edition

Posted by Matt on June 3, 2007

Outfielder Ken Griffey, Junior is not going to receive anything above “garbage” at the plate when his protection in the batting order is Edwin Encarnacion. “Easy E.” is batting a stout .253 with three home runs. Edwin has “warning track power.”

New York Yankees’ pitcher Roger Clemens will be withheld from Monday night’s game due to a “fatigued right groin.” Apparently the 43-year-old hurler has got the Levitra working for him these days…Clemens, YOU DOG, YOU!

Chicago Cubs’ skipper Lou Piniella was suspended indefinitely by Major League Baseball for a tirade that took place yesterday. The Cubs are sitting at 22-31 going in to Sunday’s play and are only two games out of last place in the National League Central. Boy, that was $300-million-dollars well spent this past off-season!

Cincinnati Bengals’ corner-back Jonathan Joseph will be out of practice until training camp due to a foot injury sustained in mini-camps. This is good news for the fact that at least being immobilized will keep Joseph out of trouble with the law for a while…we hope…

The seat under Cincinnati Reds’ manager Jerry Narron’s ass must be getting quite hot. He has already pulled a “suicide squeeze” with unproven catcher Chad Moeller followed by a stolen base by pitcher Matt “No Wheels” Belisle in today’s game. Anything to save your neck these days, eh Jerry?

That’s it for another edition of “The Sports Shorts,” we hope you enjoyed it!

-Matt

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